Author’s note: I’m going to just talk about the Rocky movies here. I’ll do a second post about the Creed movies after I’ve seen the third movie in a couple months. I looooove the Creed movies, though, especially the first one. It’s not just a great Rocky movie, but a great movie period. But we’ll get to those later. Gonna fly now…
Despite not really being all that interested in boxing (though I’ve taken it up recently — in-freaking-credible stress reliever to hit a heavy bag) and not having an appetite for raw eggs (one of the few things I don’t like raw… laaaaaadies), the Rocky franchise is a movie franchise that’s always been near and dear to my heart. I’ve seen all of the movies a shocking amount of times (hey kids, remind me to tell you what it was like being a pop-culture obsessed person in the 1980s), I listen (not past tense “-ed,” literally to this day) to the music from the various Rocky soundtracks often, and I reference quotes from those movies all the time, especially when I need to pity a fool (again kids, remind me to tell you what it was like being a pop-culture obsessed person in the 1980s).
My 12yo son Logan recently asked me to watch the Rocky movies, so we’ve slowly been making our way through the franchise. He’s really gotten into the movies, especially the final fights, where he’s taken to standing off to the side of the room and shadowboxing along while shouting “GET UP GET UP GET UP” as Rocky rolls around on the canvas (he sure does get knocked down a lot). It’s been fun to share these movies with him and to watch them again for the first time in years. I hope the lessons contained therein “stick” with Logan and he can draw on them in many of the same ways I have over the years. My daughter Chloe has a big high school dance audition coming up and was reluctant to go put in some extra time at the gym to prepare, so Logan needled her with a perfectly placed “you need the ‘eye of the tiger’” reference. There is no tomorrow, daughter of mine. THERE IS NO TOMORROW.
A friend of mine recently sent me an article where someone ranked all of the Rocky movies, from the 1976 original to 2018’s Creed II. I love reading rankings and I looooooooove ranking things on my own (seriously, it’s a freaking hobby of mine), but as I started to think about doing that here I flip-flopped so many times on where things should be ranked that I decided I’m going to go a different route here and just talk about these movies and what makes them great, or not so great if your name is Rocky V.
Rocky, 1976
Why it’s the best “Rocky” movie: The thing that sticks out the most about the original movie is how atypical it is from everything else in the franchise and from every sports movie that’s followed. In fact, it’s hardly a sports movie at all. If I had to break down what that first movie actually is, in this order; it’s a love story, then a gritty 1970s movie about a down-on-his-luck guy, and then, lastly, a sports movie. The first half of this movie is (by today’s standards) somewhat slow and barely contains any boxing at all. It’s a lot of Rocky walking around town bouncing that ball, talking with everyone from Adrian to the loan shark he works for. But then once the second half kicks in and it’s more about the fight, you can see the Rocky template start to crystalize. I’ve always been partial to template setter movies in franchises or genres (the first Rocky, When Harry Met Sally, the original Superman, and Raiders of the Lost Ark, to name a few). So because it’s the best top-to-bottom movie of the franchise (I am kind of partial to the first Creed though) it’s not a huge leap to say it’s the “best” Rocky movie.
Why it’s not the best “Rocky” movie: Yeah, like I said, it’s kind of slow. And although it set the mold, it’s not the cake itself. Most of the Rocky movies more resemble the later movies than this first movie. And sometimes, knowing what these movies actually end up becoming, can make rewatching this first movie kind of tedious. It’s like “okay, we get it, you’re a loser, let’s get to eating lightning and crapping thunder already.” It’s a great movie but it’s not the most “rewatchable” movie.
How’s the montage?: While it’s not my favorite, it might just be the “best” of the bunch. It’s really pure, you know? It comes at the point of the movie where things are starting to look up for Rocky and it’s literally just a guy exiting his apartment and going out to train with bricks in his hands. The boxing and training stuff all seem very grounded in reality and not too out there in WTF Land like the later movies. He’s just running and doing push-ups, not chopping down 200 year old trees like in Rocky IV. Philadelphia looks like total shit (check out how much trash he runs by as he’s getting cheered on) and it ends with the truly iconic run up Philadelphia Museum of Art steps. It’s freaking real as Hell, so it gets an A+.
Any “hot takes” on this one?: Yeah, this one always gets me in a little bit of trouble when I bring it up with film geeks, but the first Rocky movie deserved its Best Picture Oscar and is basically on artistic par with Taxi Driver, Network, and All the President’s Men (I haven’t seen Bound for Glory). Look, I get it. I understand movies about grit, optimism, self-worth, and what it means to “win” stand in stark contrast to the more cynical times that produced the aforementioned movies, and I fully acknowledge just how artistically groundbreaking (at least) Taxi Driver was, but Rocky belongs. It just does. There’s real “realness” happening on screen. You can learn just as much about the human condition from Rocky Balboa’s life as you can from Travis Bickle’s. And it stands to reason that Rocky becoming as big of a hit as it was means that people acknowledged that realness and welcomed it. On top of everything else, I sometimes think people (*cough cough* film geeks) conflate the first Rocky movie with the movies that followed it. The first movie is every bit of an achievement as the rest of those Oscar nominated movies.
Any other “takes” that need to be addressed: Before I begin, actually want to get it on the record that I love Adrian and Rocky’s relationship. I’ll go into greater detail on Rocky and Adrian in later paragraphs on the other movies, but I think their relationship is an upper echelon movie relationship, especially in this movie. Sylvester Stallone and Talia Shire both look fly as fuck and have crackling on-screen chemistry. No bullshit. We clear on that?
Okay, wanted to say that to soften the upcoming blow. The “courtship” scene in Rocky’s apartment hasn’t aged… well. There’s a moment after their first real date at the ice rink (what an inspired choice that movie made for their first date, btw) where Rocky essentially refuses to let Adrian leave and they end up kissing and (presumably) bumping uglies right there on Rocky’s grimy ass floor. By 2023 standards, it’s problematic (at best) and full on assault (by letter of the law) at worst. I’m not going to sit here now and place too much judgement on that scene but it all is very cringey and awkward watching that scene with 2023 eyes. Every single piece of social context that was present in 1975 America is no longer present today. Our sexual mores are different. Our heroes and icons are different. How men and women interact… all different. So while I’m not going to place too much judgement on that scene, it is important to remember that we have all learned a lot in 4+ decades. If I may step in with a quick digression here, it’s important to remember what both “consent” and “enthusiastic consent” mean. If someone says “no” or “I don’t think we should” or anything resembling that, back the fuck off. It’s important to remember to look for a “yes” rather than an absence of a “no.” It’s also important to acknowledge both verbal and non-verbal cues, all of which Adrian expressed.
Rocky II, 1979
Why it’s the best “Rocky” movie: Because I’ve never considered this movie to be the best of the bunch nor have I met anyone who considers it as such, this should be pretty short and sweet. It’s not the best Rocky movie. But the movie does at least try to keep the realness of the first movie and make these people 3 dimensional characters. Adrian, Rocky, Mickey, Apollo, and Paulie all have logical and understandable character motivations. They all seem believable and more or less like “real” people. And I’ll say this, this movie is more of a sports movie template than even the first movie. So it has that going for it.
Why it’s not the best “Rocky” movie: The movie is kind of a mess, ultimately, especially the first half. Any magic that existed in seeing Rocky and Adrian exist in this world must have left between movies because it becomes kind of tedious watching them just walk around and visiting the usual spots (although, I do like the proposal scene at the zoo). I’ll get more into this during the montage prompt, but this movie also began the Rocky trope of giving the main character a very clear and obvious life obstacle to clear; in this case, Adrian’s out of nowhere premature delivery and subsequent coma. It’s okay. It’s Rocky, you know? You know the terrain and the playing field so you roll with the contrived punches, but it can feel kind of fake and artificial at times.
How’s the montage?: This isn’t the best montage nor is it my favorite, but I freaking love this montage, especially because of the aforementioned messiness of the movie and the aforementioned illness plot point. When the montage begins in earnest, it kind of feels like the movie has officially (and finally!) begun. When Adrian leans over and says “win… win!” as the iconic Conti “Going the Distance” music kicks in, followed by the amazingly awesome “What are we waiting for,” from Mick… that’s goosebumps every. single. time. My favorite aspect of this montage is the music itself, which is my favorite musical cue from any of the Rocky movies.
Any “hot takes” on this one?:
Not so much of a hot take as more of an analytical one. The racial components of these movies have been discussed a lot and are worthy of analysis (why is Rocky always fighting a flamboyantly loud African American fighter?), but I haven’t seen as much discussion on the gender dynamics of the Rocky movies. I’ve often maintained that the Rocky movies are a lot more foundational and formative on present day masculinity than any other movie or movie franchise and I don’t think it’s even close. That self-determination thing that can result in people participating in extreme fitness regimens, in male body dysmorphia, and in martial sports (like MMA) becoming one of the biggest sports in the world; it all can be traced back (partly, not fully) to the Rocky movies. The first movie has kind of a quaint “I just want to go the distance because I’m a nobody” vibe, whereas the second movie leans heavily into tying all of that together with manhood itself.
To be clear, again, I really do love the Rocky and Adrian relationship. In the first movie, they’re a real team and a real partnership. They both give each other what they feel they are lacking; for her – confidence, for him – self love. As Rocky himself says, “She’s got gaps, I got gaps, together we fill gaps.” But everything gets all twisted and weird in the second movie.
The first movie may have touched a masculinity nerve, but the second movie fully plays into that dynamic in nakedly revealing ways. In Rocky II, Adrian is rightly worried about what a second fight with Apollo would do to Rocky’s long term health. Rocky sees that as an attack on his manhood. I know it’s all kind of complicated by the idea that they’re struggling to make ends meet and that fighting is all Rocky really knows how to do, but the idea that manhood is tied intimately to being the sole provider, to taking on challenges alone, and ultimately to beating up other men, is a clear and obvious choice the movie decides to make. Never is that dynamic more obvious than the final fight. In the first movie, they’re a real team. Remember that “Yo Adrian, we did it!” In the second movie, not only is she not at the fight, but she’s at home looking after their newborn. Different times, for sure, but the symbolism is all there and obvious. Have I mentioned that Sylvester Stallone wrote and directed the sequel?
Rocky III, 1982
Why it’s the best “Rocky” movie: This might be the most “Rocky” Rocky movie, if that makes sense. It’s the quintessential Rocky to me. It’s the one that comes to mind when I close my eyes and imagine Rocky as a franchise. Perhaps it’s because the one I saw first. Perhaps it’s because of Mr. T. Perhaps it’s because of “Eye of the Tiger,” which lives on to this day as the go-to montage song. Perhaps it’s Rocky’s white sweater. Who knows?
The thing that always cracks me up about Rocky III is that everyone not named Carl Weathers decided they were essentially done playing the characters as we’d known them up to that point. The Rocky that’s down on his luck and broke and unsure of himself? Now he’s wearing fancy sweaters as he kisses Adrian in the grass. It’s hard to imagine the Rocky from the first two movies wrestling Hulk Hogan, driving motorcycles, and without an ounce of body fat or self-doubt on him, but that’s what’s on screen in the third movie. What about the shy as a mouse Adrian? Now she’s giving motivational speeches on the beach! Not saying it’s a bad choice, but they are night-and-day different people in the third movie.
Why it’s not the best “Rocky” movie: Mr. T makes for a hilarious heel, but he’s not good at fake fighting. When they got him in close-up and slo-mo; intimidating. When they zoom out, you can 100% see every non-hit. I do love his line delivery of “Hey woman!” when he’s taunting Adrian, though. I drop that line on occasion for no real reason other than it’s a perfect line delivery. Doesn’t even care enough to say her name. Perfect heel move. I also don’t care for the Mickey death thing. Why does it take them so long to get a damn ambulance? It’s that Rocky trope coming through again.
How’s the montage?: The montage is solid but leaves a little to be desired when compared to the first two movies. When it comes to these movies;
– Philadelphia > Los Angeles
– Punching meat > swimming laps
– Running up the museum steps > hugging Apollo in the ocean
– The only place where the montage is better is via Apollo. He’s great in these scenes. “There is no tomorrow!” Amen, Apollo. Amen. And in the fourth movie, you’ll find that out firsthand.
Any “hot takes” on this one?:
Rocky III is pretty damn bad, but it’s a movie that is good because of how bad it is.
Rocky IV, 1985
Why it’s the best “Rocky” movie: This is where this franchise really kind of went off the rails, but in a gloriously fun and dumb way. For a brief period of time in 1985, this was probably my favorite movie. It was either this or the original Karate Kid, which I watched on repeat an embarrassing amount of times in 1985 and 1986. What can I say, I have a soft spot for Italian-American underdogs learning to fight while Bill Conti music swells through the speakers. But yeah, this movie is kind of a surreal trip into 1985 America, which was a really distinct time and place. A film critic I really enjoy recently dubbed this movie as “the most 80s movie,” and I can’t agree more. This movie perfectly captures mid-1980s America in a way not even John Hughes or Pete “Maverick” Mitchell could touch.
Why it’s not the best “Rocky” movie: This movie has everything cranked to 11, so it’s almost less of a movie and more of a series of Rocky’s greatest hits as told through a collection of montages. Need a “Rocky doubting himself” moment? Put it in a montage? Need the “disapproving Adrian standing on some stairs or in a doorway” shot? Put it in a montage? I think there are like 20 different montages in this movie, each put to a different song.
How’s the montage?: Because everything in this movie is cranked all the way up to 11, this movie actually has two different training montages literally one right after the other. I’m 100% serious. One montage ends, Adrian and Rocky hug, and the next one begins right away. But it’s the latter one, set to John Cafferty’s “Hearts on Fire,” that ends up being the best in the series. Look, I like to think I’m a pretty thoughtful and gentle guy. I’m a feminist. I believe in mediation and talking through problems. I like exploring ideas of masculinity and redefining it and yada yada yada… All that being said, I love every second of that freaking montage. He’s fucking lifting rocks, yo. He’s lifting Duke, Adrian, and Paulie in a fucking ox cart! Drago is getting all shot up with steroids while Rocky is crumpling up a photo of Drago from his mirror. Drago is running around a pristine track while Rocky is helping poor Russian stereotypes get their horse out of a snowbank. Rocky isn’t just jumping rope, he’s elevating like a foot into the air as he does so. IT’S HYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYPE.
Any “hot takes” on this one?:
It’s always funny to me that they added the “Russians are doping” piece of this when Sylvester Stallone was allllllllllllll the way roided up in this era. Also… Paulie is 10000% fucking that robot Rocky gives him. That’s a fact. …and it’s gross.
Rocky V, 1990
Why it’s the best “Rocky” movie: Let’s cut to the chase here… there is no world where this is the best Rocky movie. In fact, this is the consensus worst Rocky movie. But kudos to this movie for making the good choice of getting these characters back to their blue-collar Philadelphia roots. I also like that he cast his actual son, Sage Stallone (who died tragically young), as his movie son.
Why it’s not the best “Rocky” movie: By this point, the cupboard was bare and the formula worn thin. There was nothing more to really say in this franchise so it really comes off as everyone cashing a paycheck instead making the movie for the right reasons. The antagonist was the weakest of the series. The score was subpar. No great training montages. No great acting moments.
How’s the montage?: I mean… it’s not great. It’s not god-awful either. I do like how they juxtaposed Rocky training Tommy over Paulie training Rocky’s son. That’s a nice touch. But it all comes off as kind of hackneyed and lite.
Any “hot takes” on this one?:
Nope. Not a single one. NEEEEEEEEEEXT!
Rocky Balboa, 2006
Why it’s the best “Rocky” movie: If you can get past the unbelievability of it all, I’ve always loved stories where an aging performer/actor/athlete/etc. gives it one more “go.” If this were real life, Rocky’s head would be pure mush after this many decades in the ring, but in the fanciful world of the Rocky movies, this story kind of works. Plus, I like that they stylistically tried to replicate the look and feel of the earlier movies. That was smart to add a little grittiness to the cinematography and set design.
Plus Plus, it’s a pretty baller move to write Adrian out like that. I’m a big fan of their relationship and it was the central throughline between all of these movies. Removing her adds an extra dimension to the Rocky character that kind of grounds him again.
Plus Plus Plus, the speech Rocky gives his son about “how winning is done,” is the single best speech in any of the Rocky movies, and it’s not even close. It’s perfectly written and an excellent summation of why these movies are so watchable and relatable.
Why it’s not the best “Rocky” movie: As much as I love a movie about an aging athlete, it really does look ridiculous watching a 60 year old Sylvester Stallone do all the normal Rocky stuff. The story kind of works overall, but the ridiculousness of it all really pulls me out of the experience.
How’s the montage?: It’s pretty good. The trumpet that blares over the montage kind of takes me out of it, to be honest. Tone it down there, Miles Davis.
Now that we’re here, I have the montage scenes ranked as such: Rocky IV > Rocky > Rocky II > Rocky III > Rocky Balboa > Rocky 5.
Any “hot takes” on this one?: Not really a hot take, but I watch that “that’s how winning is done” speech once every few months. It’s not just a great Rocky speech, it’s a great movie speech period. Check it out for yourself.
On the music of the “Rocky” series:
I wasn’t joking earlier when I said I listen to the Rocky music a lot. I mean, it’s not something I just listen to in my spare time, but if I ever find myself in a phase where I’m exercising a lot (which I’m in one now), the Rocky music gets played a ton. I checked out my most played lists for the past couple months and it’s a whooooole bunch of Wu-Tang Clan and a whoooooole bunch of Bill Conti. When you’re burning out on mile 2 of a 3 mile run and need a little extra internal motivation, you’d be surprised what the musical cues “Going the Distance” (from Rocky II) or “If I Fight, You Fight” (from Creed) will do for you. That’s not even touching on Survivor’s “Eye of the Tiger” or the aforementioned “Hearts on Fire.” I know it all sounds very corny but it freaking works. Sometimes our barriers are more mental than physical and channeling your inner Balboa can get you across the finish line.
An open and shut book 
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